No-one's perfect

Ok so here’s the fun but usually secret stuff….me doing all manner of silly things that could be the result of just being me, menopausal confusion, my resistance to wearing glasses all the time or too much going on in my life and not enough time to really think…..

1.Recently I was found vainly trying to squirt a cockroach dead with the spray bottle of cooking oil…..( unfortunately I was found by Miss Nearly Independent and Don’t Hassle Me who both thought it was so…funny they told EVERYONE they knew)..now they check my cooking, worried about a reversal and what fly spray may do to them!

2.The other weekend I had a little friend over for babysitting (me babysitting him) and we made biscuits together…only I didn’t read the small print and thinking the mix would only make about 24 I doubled it …..and made 248 biscuites, yes you read it right 248 not 48…seems impossible right? Well it wasn’t, only tiring…..The small print was important in a big way...( unfortunately for me again, my lovely daughter, Miss Independent was home visiting at the time and she thought it so…funny that she wrote it up for her feature that week in the paper she writes for…..is there no end to my infamy!)

3.Some time ago I was dropped at the shopping centre by my hubby. Hurriedly getting out of the car I slipped on my sandals and then proceeded to do a lovely days shopping. Standing on the escalator, as I was heading for home, I looked down and observed an embarrassing thing…I had two different sandals on…how I did not notice until now I can not imagine….perhaps I am more mesmerized by shopping and fluoro lights than I had realized??? (I just wonder what the other shoppers thought?? Hopefully they were mesmerized too and did not notice either???)

4.Not a week goes by when I don’t put my bra on back to front at least once and wonder why I cannot do it up. ( perhaps its subliminal because I never used to wear a Bra…I am from the 70’s emancipated and free, we burned bras…and now need them because gravity catches up with us all…..oh the hypocrisy of it all)

5.I constantly get my kids names mixed up (truthfully I am loathe to admit this one because my Mum used to do it too and I thought she was really old and getting confused, poor thing)….that cannot be me, come on now, it really cannot!

6.I spend endless time looking for my glasses, only to discover that I am wearing them, or worse , have put them in the fridge or similar….(presumably for safe keeping?) I think really it is because I hate the things…they speak loudly of my age (how dare they!) and they look freakish/or rather I do when I wear them.


Please do not get the wrong idea however, generally I am an erudite, intelligent, aware and with it individual…..it’s just occasionally that I slip up and show my more flakey side. Without it I might be boring, so what the heck, embrace it all I say. Without it I might also be less amusing for my children, and who wants to be seen as a serious wacko, a funny one is much more palatable!