10 ways that Mum is wrong

10 ways that Mum is wrong:

Let me pre-empt this with a few background notes; firstly, I am female, which in some eyes almost certainly indicates that I should most likely be wrong or at least not entirely right in most situations (God forbid!!!)…..that extra chromosome of the male species is apparently what predisposes them to be always right…secondly I am a Mum and by default then, of the ‘older’ generation, and both of these things call me into question. After all, experience, years and years of practice and age only serve to make you naïve about the state of things as they are in the world….so the ten things( a tip of the iceberg so to speak)

1. I am wrong when I worry about the puppy…( you know, how he copes when we are away for long hours, what he is trying to ingest that looks like someone’s’ makeup and was found under a suspect bed etc…)
2. I am wrong when I do not worry about the puppy….( you know, he is just a poor little thing and its wrong to expect that because he is an animal he can just manage…..that’s a form of prejudice you know…)
3. I am wrong when I yell at the Puppy; I am just so over-reactive and loud…
4. I am wrong when I am too soft on the puppy…especially when he is chewing someone’s socks or toes or has had a personal wee accident on their bedroom floor….
5. I am wrong when I yell at almost anyone else in the household for almost anything…because they were of course just about to do whatever it is I had wrongfully believed they were not going to do…or they were just distracted and didn’t even hear or know, they are tired, sick overwhelmed….etc
6.I am also often wrong when I do not yell at someone in the family for doing something that they really shouldn’t of (and I wont mention here) because I should have at least grounded them or something, and this would definitely be preferable to the guilt they now have to wear!!!(Such a torturous parent I am)
7. I am wrong when I have a political view point because I am ‘not in touch…prejudist…a mum….older….’ (Who was it that helped instill those moral values and a sense of fairness….oh yes that old HIPPY parent of theirs, you know HIPPIES are funny aren’t they….no prejudice intended of course)
8. I am wrong when I think I can make pastry without eggs….even though I have been making it this way for an age, or that tomatoes taste better with a dab of sugar, or that vinegar will stop a hard boiled egg from spreading if it cracks on the way to becoming hard boiled…old wives tails !!!
9. I am also wrong when I think people automatically think I might be wrong…perhaps even a tad paranoid…but I think I could let you decide that…or would that be wrong???
10. I am especially wrong when I yell for my son to pull over in a full on downpour turning rapidly into hail on a highway in a car with learners plates on it because hey my son is a ….learner……to be fair he had his dad next to him and he had it under control…and I should have known( how can someone who is always wrong know anything I want to know?)
11. I am wrong when I say that the world is round…..ok so that is taking it a little too far, so I am exaggerating a bit…but really I sometimes feel…….,

Actually I sometimes feel afraid, sad, forgotten, lost and lonely, like I need a cuddle…..vulnerable…..overwhelmed….human …but invariably I guess I am just wrong….